Longs Drugs is no more :(

CVS Pharmacy now owns Longs Drugs.
I walked into a Longs Drugs and everything was discombobulated, every employee was wearing a blue collared shirt instead of the usual green color. I was completely stoned and couldn't find my way around the store to purchase my usual necessities. The store was 10x uglier.



Slap of the week:

Husalah & B-Luv - Cuttin' It Up. - See the latest featured music videos.

The Jesus

The Big Lebowski - That Creep Can Roll

Watching this makes me want to grow a pony tail.

Until next time

K. WEST?

808s & Heartbreak
CD Rating: 5.5/10
I think I might be generous with that rating too.
It hurts my ears. Please go back to rapping, this album is embarrassing.
I am not impressed with all this vocalizing garbage.

prop 8 aint right

First of all, Sorry to all the McCain supporters... I'm about to go smoke a blunt with Obama. Nov. 4th was was rainy fucking day in San Diego. The rain almost made me not want to vote, but I had no choice, this was my first time voting and it was an important election. When I was at the polls voting, there was one prop that I looked into more deeply than others. First I voted No on the Beach Drinking Ban which bans drinking on San Diego beaches (because I like to get fucked up on the beach), but secondly I voted No on Prop 8. First of all, voting No on 8 does not make you a homo, I seriously had my pen pressed on Yes because I didn't really care and I didn't want change, change that could affect me. Then I realized, it doesn't affect me at all. And Yes We Can Change..does that ring a bell? I know my conservative asian parents voted Yes and I can tell you that 99% of the f.o.b's from other countries voted Yes. Here's the thing, If you voted Yes on 8, it means you don't believe in the advancement of society and/or too senile to see the future (I mean.. who would have thought a Black President yeeeboyyy). I've realized it doesn't matter if your straight or not. It's about fucking civil liberties and you cannot take that away from anyone.. we live in America for god sakes. It's appalling to see that California of all places is still stalling on this issue. To the religious douche bags that believe that marriage is between a man and a woman, your argument is just so fucking embarrassing. If you still believe gay marriage affects your life and your families, PLEASE get a clue because it has nothing to do with your life. We need to move ahead of discrimination and step into the fucking 21st century.

P.s. I love pussy

note: on the...vma's

god that kanye west song at the end was terrible...atrocious... i'm a kanye fan, but that song hurt my ears, i had to turn that shit off.

by the way, did britney spears get all those awards because mtv feels bad for fucking up her life the past couple of years. and who the fuck is tokyo hotel and jonas brothers?(apparently these kids don't have sex... I hope they do alot of drugs)
Thank god i don't have to grow up with this crap. where have all the entertainment value gone...

Drinking Age to be 18?

I was reading some CNN today and I ran into an article about some college administrators pushing for the drinking age to be lowered to 18. I'm just sitting here thinking about how STUPID that would be.
First of all, this is America. If it was any where else, you could get a drink when you got tall enough to reach the bar. The thing is.. most people that want the legal drinking age to be lowered to 18... are 18 year olds. I fully oppose lowering the drinking age to 18 because I know 18 year olds and I was once 18. 18 year olds are still immature spoiled little douche bags in America. I mean what's the point to even lower it, it's not that hard to get a homeless guy to buy you a 40oz or just raid your parents stash. One of my biggest concerns is that the next time I go to the bars, I'm going to see a bunch of rowdy 18 year old high school kids (that would just kill the entire fun factor of going to the bars). Lets not forget how many fights would probably go down. This country is not ready to lower the drinking age. The people of this country are already too fucking retarded and if we let them drink at the age of 18, we are all fucked. Look what happened when we allowed 18 year olds to vote, we got some douchebag by the name of George W. Bush as our President. What happened to the Abe Lincolns and shit? (don't look at me, i didn't even vote) If we are to make any important changes, we should ban the federal system from busting people that legitamitely carry a canabis club card.

finally

less brett favre news. replaced with michael phelps kicking ass news.

Taking a fat dump at the Olympics?

Olympics in China? Could this be the worst idea ever? Worse than that time your dad forgot to wear a condom. Anyways I'm not even going to get into the whole "pollutions" discussion because it's already been hit by a car and then by a greyhound. (fact #1: all Americans think their lungs are so much better than the rest of the worlds) Chinese people smoke 10 packs of cigarettes a day and they don't hold marathons for lung cancer, you bunch of pussy's. Back to my discussion.. Over 1 billion people in a country, lets add like a million more and concentrate it in one area. What fucking idiot thought of this idea? What is the country of China going to do with all the human waste? If you have been to China, you will know that every time you eat a meal, you have to go number 2, don't even attempt to hold it in or you will suffer the consequence. (Factoid #2: the crap to meal ratio is 1:1 if your a tourist and occasionally 2:1, even their McDonald's make you shit) Lets move on. Have you been to Chinatown lately? If not, well it smells like shit and looks like shit. Don't even act like your Chinatown is more awesome and cleaner than others cause that is a fucking dream. Now picture Chinatown as an entire country, you would get China. Then picture someone putting in a worlds sporting event in a big pile of shit. You will realize that the idiot who arranged the Olympics this year has been smoking way too much opium. I'm all for the Olympics, but does anyone know where all that human shit is going to drain into?? It better not get to my side of the Pacific. Although, I wouldn't mind seeing some dumb bitches in San Diego get their 150 dollar swimsuit covered in shit.

Flaw in the Voting system

How many people do you think are go to the voting booth high as balls this year? Is that how George Bush won?

High Thoughts at the Voting Booth:

Election 2004: George Bush's name has more letters than John Kerry's name...vote for person with more letters in their name.

Election 2008: I want Obama to win, but I like elephants way more than donkeys. Unless the Democrats change their party logo to a great white shark.

I love your city

Thank you Boston. Even after a 9 hour flight because of a layover and I smelled like shit, you still welcomed me. There is just so much to say about you, your great in every way. The people are awesome, even though I dislike Red Sox fans. I smoked the fatttest Dutch Masters on your rooftops. And I must say, I like them more than Swisher Sweets. I chilled on a lot of rooftops in Boston, but i really wanted to hang out on a stoop. I love the way your covered in brick and mortar, it makes you look so sexy. And of course, you have a wonderful public transportation system because taxi's cost more than a tank of gas. Your humidity in the summer just makes me so hot and sweaty. Until next time Boston. Keep it real east coast.
fireworks from laurens rooftop

plane ride etiquette

Yesterday I had a flight from Oakland to San Diego. I was out drinking til 2am and my flight was scheduled at 6am. So I woke up at 5 and get to the airport. Get onto the plane with a hangover and I already knew I was in for trouble. Hella fucking kids are on the plane. I get a fantastic seat in front of a young mexican child. She looked like she was a well bred kid and I wouldn't have to worry about anything. I was wrong.. god damn mexican jumping bean kept kicking the back of my seat. Then I ask her nicely to stop kicking my seat. Damn kid didn't speak english, neither did her mother. Fucking great.. Stuck on a 1.5 hour plane ride. That wasn't the worst thing. Some fool let off a disgusting fart. Stuck in a gas chamber with a painfully vibrating seat. F'ing fantastic. Hopefully I can avoid this on my next flight from SD to Boston in 2 days.
Here is a list of things you should consider before taking a flight.
1. Do you smell like shit. (most passengers do not want to sit in a flight next to a bum, so take a shower.)
2. Do you need to fart. (we will be most thankful if you did that before boarding.)
3. Do you have a kid. (teach them how to act in public, your not at home.)
4. Are your obese. (buy 2 tickets, your layer of fat is hanging on my armrest..)
5. Do you speak English. (What if I wanted to have a conversation with you.)

Hilarious craigslist post

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sac/367120651.html

To the potheads who took 1 of the 4 free patio chairs I posted on CL

---

Date: 2007-07-05, 11:36AM PDT


You two girls were amped up about the 4 free patio chairs that I posted on CL. You came over, wafting the aroma of the sticky-icky as you walked by, and sat in the chairs and decided that they were the chairs for you. My husband and I proceeded to pick them up to carry them out front when we were informed that you were driving a Honda Civic. Insisting that you could fit one chair in and then come back for the rest, you squeezed about 4 inches of the chair into the car as the passenger held on tight to the 90% of the chair that was dangling on the outside. Many months have since passed and we have yet to see you stoners again. In my mind, there are 4 likely reasons as to why we have not seen you girls again:

1) You simply forgot where you got the chair and why you even wanted it in the first place and have been mesmerized by an Abbazabba wrapper ever since.

2) You forgot that they were free and are currently piled (along with 3 or 4 friends) on the single chair, passing the dutch and laughing about how you got away with a free chair.

3) On your way home, you forgot where you lived and are still driving around with that damn chair dangling out the window. In which case, am willing to wait a little longer for you to find your way home because I'm certain that once you do, you'll come back for the rest.

4) You smoked the chair.

Either way, it is quite annoying having 3 chairs and I have found that it is much harder giving away a set of 3 than a set of 4. Admittedly, it will be hard to re-post these chairs because every time I see them I think of the two of you and wonder just what exactly became of that lone chair. I hope that whatever you did with it, it was well enjoyed.

Godspeed, you crazy potheads.
----------------------------------------------

Buy the...

http://www.lulu.com/content/2406879

My friend Zee wrote a book. I heard its good, but I don't read books. She wrote it when she was very ill.
Catastrophes bond people, didn't you know that?

2 Candidates 1 Cup

Like I said before I don't really care for politics. But I will make fun of Hilary Clinton for giving up. What kind of role model would I be if I told people giving up was Ok. No fuck that, Rosa Parks didn't give up, neither did Lance Armstrong and his one nut. And Vince Fung sure as hell doesn't give up *except on dumb hoes. I'm going to skip the whole lecture of saying "giving up is for losers" and just boldly state that "giving up is like getting shit on". I guess Barack holds the cup in this scenario.

Craigslist is fucking up our economy

I've been trying to find a job for summer, but all i've been getting is offers to work as a shitty door-to-door salesmen "marketing job" selling shit for At&t. FUCK THAT, i'm not a boyscout. Why can't a good citizen like myself get a decent job? The culprit is Craigslist. Companies are getting at least 500 resume emails a day because of Craigslist. Which gives me a 1/500 chance of getting that Office Assistant position. And if I were that company I would hire either hot chicks or a UCLA grad student (I am neither). My big problem is that the company is located in Orinda, California and people usually don't know where this place is. But because of Craigslist, people now can apply to work there even if they have no clue where this city is. And yes, Orinda has a Bart Station unlike the city of Moraga who doesn't even have a freeway entrance. But not only can they apply to work at that company in Orinda, they are applying to 500 other companies all over the country with the click of a button. Where does that leave me the SDSU undergrad student who smokes a shit load of herb? Well for one thing I can't smoke anymore because I have no money and now I am also jobless. Craigslist fucks up mine and a bunch of other peoples chances for the job who actually know where the fuck Orinda is. So all you unemployed people out there trying to find a job in your quaint little town, Craigslist is fucking up your opportunity to prove yourself.

the old man that always sits next to jack nicholson at laker games

this post is dedicated to the old guy who always sits next to jack at Lakers games. no one really knows who he is and no one really cares. Anyways, Game 2 tonight. I hate boston fans (specially the fans that wear nothing but redsox gear), but I hope Celtics fuck up the Lakers again because i hate the Lakers.

by the way, that old guy is Lou Adler. Cisco adlers father. what a fucking joke

The Round Up review

I was pretty stoked to go to the round up today after the A's game. Then i went.. I was not impressed at all. It was a bunch of old men and middle aged women trying to recreate their high school days. I plan to never go there again, unless i'm forced to. Fuck the Round Up Saloon. Just go to Petars instead, its right behind the roundup.

Hilary Clinton quit, shes out of the race

quitters never win, Mrs. Clinton. hate to say it, but i saw this coming hella days ago.

Awesome Present

Today I got a package in the mail. It was a bday present.
fUCKING MAPLE-BACON LOLLIPOPS. link to old post
From:Sis
To:Vince


and Yes these are really delicious, if you were wondering. I could eat these things alll day.
photoshopped in some Kanye shades because I'm not sober.

issue 16 Mr. Fan shits on a tree.

The Poem Game

So this weekend (my 21st birthday weekend) we decided to test out the poem game. I was literally amazed by it, so I had to let my fans know. It's so advanced and sophisticated, yet at the same time it's so basic and we have all learned it in 5th grade. So me and my friends were having brunch at this spot in San Diego called Bully's East. We got seated and our waitress came, and she was a pretty attractive girl. My friends Z and Ad kept talking about this poem game and they wanted to try it out on her. We asked the waitress for a pen and went to work on it. Ad made up a poem and I wrote it down on the napkin. The poem went something like: I just got off the plane, and I never seen such a beautiful dame, something something... just like the huevos rancheros on my tray, you could be the most important part of my day. and it ended with asking her to go to the Padres game. Then I left Z's number on the napkin. We put the poem with the tab and we left. I think it would be better if we had stayed. But it was our first time trying it and we didn't know how she would react. I honestly never thought it would work, but it worked out pretty successfully. Later that night, we were at the Padres game and Z got a text. Who could it be.. Yes it was our favorite waitress
Heres what she said:
Hi there, had to let u know, although i'm seeing someone, that note made my day!By far the funniest poem i've ever read!Take care and have fun at the game:)
YE SON! so it was pretty much failed mission from the beginning because she already had a man. but at this point we felt the need to keep it going, so Ad made up another poem while we were at the game. I don't think he got a response after that because it was pretty raunchy.

issue 15

Luckily for Bundy, the gentlemen who found her were sober and had good moral judgment. Her unattractiveness was a big factor.

Things Asians will never be able to do

I'm sitting here watching the Celtics game and it got me thinking. Theres only a limited amount of Asians in the NBA. Other than Yao Ming, and that asian guy in the back that passes Gatorade to Paul Pierce. Basketball player, Water boy,.. there is just something missing... if you haven't figured it out already, it's the Coach. There will never in 100 years be an Asian NBA Coach. Never gonna happen, why? probably because of pedigree. And Yao will not be an NBA Coach after he retires because NBA players don't fucking speak chinese. We can't be NBA coachs? fuck..vince what else can't we do? Well my asian fans, I have compiled a list of things Asians will never be able to do, so you won't have to waste your time trying.

1. NBA Coach
2. President of USA
3. #1 on the Billboards
4. Academy Awards Best Actor/Actress
5. Save the Whales

Will Asians ever claim the spotlight? Well there is only one thing I can think of that Asains Can do. And that is, cure cancer. Thats right, when everyone else is out doing charity walks for cancer (apparently walking 10 miles helps cure diseases), asians are working hard in the lab trying to cure cancer. so work hard niggas (its cool i'm part black). another thing asian guys will never be able to do is marry a black girl. exception: asian girls CAN marry black guys..(example outcome: tiger woods)

Lil Wayne Leaks

If you haven't noticed already Lil Wayne is the king of leaks. A Leak is, music that isn't officially out for the public, but is somehow leaked out. Pretty much its music still in production and sometimes leaks are dumped and wont make the official album. I've been downloading lil wayne leaks for 2 years. i love it. Most of his lyrics are becoming repetitive. "fucking bitches" and "getting money", is most likely what you will hear from his songs. But those lyrics is what keeps people listening. (who the fuck listens to emo rap)... The problem with leaks is that the shit isn't fully produced, so it sounds like they are crankin out tracks out of a garage example: comfortable by lil wayne (kanye west made the beat), i love that song and it has alot of potential, but it sounds like shit cause it wasn't mixed well. But I think everyone should leak their music, after all.. whats the point in making it if no one gets to hear it. Its also a good marketing scheme, it makes the people who download their music feel like they are part of an exclusive club (only suckers wait for official album releases). Just keep cranking out that music lil weezy, its genius.

issue 14

cartoon for my music video
I've created a storyboard for my music video while i was in the library studying for my spanish final...(i may have failed my final, it was really hard) lets hope my single hits the billboards.

The Hottest Single

boomp3.com

It Only Gets Hotter -by The Heeb,
(produced by the noob; aka me)


My first noob attempt to make a "hot joint" (been watching alot of b.e.t in the morning lately)
now......to wait for a record label to sign me.

Whats in Florida? ....space camp

The Chronicles of Eskimo Jones, By Jordan Rudman. (aka the heeb)

Cereality WTF?!

http://www.cereality.com

Lets evaluate this business.(since i'm an international business major and all)
average box of cereal: 4 dollars. (unless you get it on sale)
servings - the box says 16, but its probably like 10.
gallon of milk: 4 dollars.

the cost of a bucket of cereal at Cereality - 3.60 dollars + tax
but wait, theres more..you get to mix 2 scoops of cereal, 2 toppings, milk.

lets break that down.
If you did this at home, its .40 cents a serving for cereal, .40 cents for milk, and 2 toppings?(fruits,nuts,m&m's) i'm going to add a generous .50 cents.
add it all up. $1.30 + the hard labor of pouring shit into a bowl.

Is America getting too lazy to make the laziest meal... i mean with these gas prices, i'm surprised more people aren't eating cheaper..

Whats up with people trying to be all hip and healthy... Your not improving your health by driving to the store to eat cereal...
Cereality a good concept? you be the judge.
in my opinion, this junk is going bankrupt in 3 years, if not quicker, unless this country is really that fat and lazy.. or hey, it could be proof that anyone can achieve the American Dream.

p.s. i need a job, will you guys hire me. im good at throwing shit into a bowl. and ill do it with passion for 8.50 an hour

Top Ten Reasons to own a cellphone

1. You don't need a landline anymore.
2. Pick up chicks. (flash that sweet iphone all around to show you have the money to buy one and ahead with new technology)
3. Avoid ugly girls. (call up a hot girl to appear)
4. Create an awkward moment. (aka: the guy with the celine dion ringtone)
5. Get out of awkward situations. (pretend someone is calling you)
6. Piss people off for fun. (stop answering important calls and texts)
7. Use it as a weapon.
8. Pull it out in class to make the time pass by faster.
9. Pull it out to look at. (you still have zero missed calls)
10. Too broke to purchase a vibrator after you bought your iphone. (its multipurpose)

To anyone that wants to drop out of school..

I am 100% with you all the way, while I procrastinate on writing this paper. Why do I have to write this editorial for this english class anyways? and why am i still taking english (oh yes its because i didn't pass my writing proficiency assessment test)... but besides that fact, I don't need college to be successful, look at Vince Chase from Entourage. He didn't go to college and he gets to date mandy moore and owns rolls royce phantom. Like Michael Scott from the Office says, "Who needs business school? Lebron James and Kobe Bryant didn't." (Yes I do relate my life to fictional television characters.) Can someone tell me why famous people that never went to college do commercials for Eduction. Do they know what goes on in Americas education system? doubt it, because if they did, they would fully oppose it. They have never stayed up til 5am studying for a molecular science or finance240 mid-term. Or have taken Adderall or Ritalin for the purposes of studying... Why do I get marked off points when I don't go to class? Aren't I technically the employer since I am paying out the ass for my "education". Shouldn't I be able to tell the professor when to come to work. Anyways, If I actually dropped out of school my parents would kick my ass (cause i'm chinese), so I better stay put and get that degree.
Lets face it, being employed at Walmart and having to ask how some guy's (who went to college) day is.. would suck. plus you know he's having a great day and your not because you just had to clean up puke on aisle 239 (yeah walmart got bigger). But Walmart only employs semi retards, rednecks and illegal immigrants so i should be fine from that little corporation, but Costco, thats just a whole different story.(food samples are genius)

iron man

iron man was a very sick movie, partly because it looked so real. Audi has their own little marketing campaign through out the movie but who cares they have some sick ass cars like the s5 and r8. go see it now people! i'm glad my high wore off during the previews or i wouldn't have remembered how sick that movie was.

Vince's Hype

Todays Hype:

Maple-Bacon Lollipops & Justine Ezarik

Why did i combine an edible treat and a public figure? because they are both so f'n desirable. First of all, I have never had either but it is in the works...and by that i mean i'll have to first scrounge around for 10 dollars for 4 lollipops (i can barely afford the top ramen thats keeping me alive) and somehow become famous and rich to meet this really hot tech/blog girl that somehow got famous from strapping a camera to her dome. but lets face it, if Justine was ugly, no one would pay attention to her (but maybe its because I'm shallow). Now your probably thinking to yourself... neither of them sound that great, vince, your just a stoner that created his own fan club and you don't officially have any fans except for yourself. First of all please Google: Justine Ezarik, now you understand what i'm saying. She even has her own wikipedia definition..thats when you know your life is going places.. (by the way can someone go ahead and create a wikipedia definition for me because every time i do, it just gets erased.)
Ok lets segue into (yeah i used the word segue, i goto college, bitches.) the maple-bacon lollipops, my friend told me about it last night when we were both really blazed. Apparently, the lollipops are made in a house in san francisco (bay area love baby) and my friend speaks highly of these lollipops and i quote, " They are the most delicious thing I've ever eaten in my life." Unfortunately, there isn't a wide variety, but who cares, theres two amazing flavors, Absinthe lollipops & Maple bacon. He is running the business through the internet. Please show this guy support and let me know how either of them tastes. I would like to also add a famous celebrity has already bought a batch from him for a wedding.(and we all know famous celebritys only eat things doused in gold.) Now I want all my fans (aka: myself) to work on getting me either of these hypes, but first get me on that wiki.

http://lollyphile.com/index.php (check out them lollipops!) it's a great way to compliment that hot lil wayne song.

http://tastyblogsnack.com/ (yeah Justine's got a blog too, but lets face it mines way better, but then again i have zero fans.)
by the way what a great coincidence that I'm talking about lollipops and her website is tasty blog snack. Hit me up if your ever in San Diego, Justine. I might you a drink.

issue 13

i've been too busy lately sleeping in class to draw up new cartoons.
but its back! i would also like to add ... This is where amazing happens.

greatest invention made by the mexicans

The Burrito is the greatest invention made by the mexicans...and maybe even the only.. the burrito beats the jew's who made the bagels, the italians and their pizza, asians and their chicken fried rice. Anyways back to the subject, you can eat a burrito any time of the day. For breakfast we have the breakfast burrito, you just make a normal breakfast (eggs, bacon, hashbrowns, sausages, melt some cheese) and wrap that bitch up in a fat piece of tortilla. For lunch, some chicken and shit, For dinner same fuckin thing or maybe you want to switch it up and put some steak or carnitas. I mean if you look at it, you can wrap pretty much anything with a tortilla and call it a burrito. Thank you Mexicans for the great invention, whats next?? well maybe you guys should work on crossing the border first. and please people support your local hole in the wall mexican restaurant, you don't want to eat at a place where food is inspected like taco bell... its just not the mexican way.

HECHO EN MEXICO (MEHH-HEE-CO)



update: my friend heeb just informed me of something and it just so happens that mexicans did not invent the burrito. they dont even have burritos in mexico. well its come to my conclusion that mexicans have never invented anything. but at least they still can claim the spot in front of home depot.

the golden state warriors will not be going to the playoffs

"fuck em."

You've been RickRolled SON!!!!

In 24 hours, Rick Astley will be more famous than he has ever been in his prime because of the good ol' internet and that little company Google bought for 1.7 billion dollars.. called youtube just pulled off the greatest april fools ever...(wait would that make google stocks will go up??) youtube wont even let you embed the video, that means if they did all their servers would crash because this video is going to be bumrushed with so much traffic. so thank you dailymotion for being the 2nd best video site and allowing me to embed this video. Rick Astly of course will not surpass the traffic on 2girls1cup because that was just ridiculous. I predict this will probably be on vh1 best week ever, this craze is growing by the second.. soon everyone will have this on their ipod!!! YESS go RICK!!! this song is so miserable even when i'm high.

Rick Astley - Never Gonna Give You Up

Sonic's Drive In

Sonics commercials, I think they started to show those last year or something like that but every time I see one of these fucking commercials it pisses me off because there is no fucking Sonics within a 50 mile radius around me. I guess it's similar to Disneyland commercials because that place is also miles away. But Disneyland is the most magical place on earth so I guess its worth going miles to. But Sonic's... this place is like a run down drive-in and if you got Jack in the Box and Denny's and made a baby that would be Sonics (a not so magical place). But their commercials are fucking effective, every time I'm high and this fucking commercial pops out it makes me want one of those shakes! One time me and my friend the Heeb made the journey, it was like harold and kumar minus the awesome adventure and an emphasis on a long ass car ride, but at least we were high as balls. We got there and we got some breakfast meal and I have to say, the food was pretty good but it wasn't worth the drive, I would have spent my money better seeing mickey mouse. My advice for Sonics Drive In is to put that shit closer to major cities and stop hiding your restaurants in the shittiest parts of america.

Heebs Visit to SD issue 12

To everyone that likes to text message while driving

People please stop text messaging while your driving on the freeway. seriously.. especially the girls cause they cant stay in their own lane in the first place and they are the most common people that do this. First of all, you are slowing down traffic, 2nd you will cause an accident and you might hit my Porsche (ok i lied, i don't own a Porsche, but i value my car as if it were a Porsche), which slows down the traffic even more because people like to slow down to look at accidents. 3rd, why don't you fucking CALL, do you REALLY have to text... 4th, your friend doesn't want to talk to you in the first place, you're not even on their fave 5, you fucking loser. It's worse than driving while high, at least when you're high you're more focused on following the rules of the road.

Why people love Barack Obama

I'm not a political guy, but I have some theory's on why people like good ol' Barack.
First of all, everyone in America wants change.. and who better than Obama? Aren't you sick of looking at white people all the time on T.V? He is like that one brotha you chilled with in high school and you thought you were diverse and cool, but he was pretty much white cause he chilled with your white ass all the time.
Second, have you seen his debates with Hilary? When she talks, he looks at her in an overly nice way. But it isn't really that nice, its undermining. Like when you talk to foreign exchange students and you want to be nice to them, but you talk to them like they are little kids. We don't want a little kid to run this country. Obama probably loves listening to earth wind and fire and the temptations. Hilary probably listens to some classical or symphony's and maybe some U2 trying to be all sophisticated and shit.
Third, why do black people love john mayer? It's the same reason why white people love barack obama. They are chill ass motherfuckers, they aren't douche bags and you want to be friends with them if you met them. I would love to smoke a fat blunt with barack or john.
So in that note, Fuck Hilary and Vote Obama

issue 11

fear the beard bitches!

BOSTON AINT SHIT BUT BITCHES, WHAT DID YOU EXPECT???. B DIDDY AT THE ORACLE BITCCHESSSS
boston cant grow a beard, they havent even gone through puberty

issue 10

you are high as a fucking kite

just found this out from Nut. i think this is going to be the most amazing movie ever created, and i can watch this trailer over and over again

issue 9.2

issue 9.1

issue 8

issue 7

issue 6

issue 5

Back to Lafayette

I'm sitting at the Oakland airport waiting for my dad to get me. Special thanks to Dan the man for driving me to the airport.
Sent via BlackBerry

issue 4

issue 3

issue 2

issue 1